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Bible Study Broken

I am Broken: Waiting on God(infertility and loss)

Looking at woman of the Bible and waiting, I often think of Sarah and Hannah. Sarah and Hannah both waited on God for children. It is hard for women to deal with issues of having children be it infertility or miscarriages because it is so painful, emotionally draining, and all consuming. Many have been waiting all their life to finally have children, only to be met with the a bitter disappointment.

There are a number of women in the Bible who experienced infertility: Rachael (Gen. 30),  Manoah’s wife (Judges 13), Hannah (1 Sam. 1), Michel (2 Sam. 6), and Sarah.

Sarah had gone 90 years without having any children. That was a lot of waiting. I imagine there were tears and heartache. We know there was a lack of trust in God’s faithfulness and goodness as she gave her maidservant to her husband in order to obtain a child. Perhaps by the time she was 90 she had resigned herself to the fact that she was never going to be a mother. We know she was wrong.

In this study we chose to focus on Sarah because in the midst of her infertility story we read a very important truth…

“Is anything too hard for the Lord?”

The answer is, “Of course not!” The Lord can do anything according to his will.

He can heal bodies in ways that baffle doctors. He can give children to couples who never thought it was possible.

But there is something else that the Lord can do. Something, perhaps, even more miraculous. He can give real joy and contentment in the midst of pain.

Expecting the Impossible

Contentment and joy in the midst of difficulty and suffering – something as unlikely as the barren womb conceiving a baby – can seem like an impossibility. But remember that with God nothing is impossible.

His power is stronger than any suffering. He can heal the sick, raise the dead, and change the heart of a sinner. He is able to give contentment and joy to the brokenhearted because He can create something out of nothing.

We must draw close to Him in order to lay our hands on it. We must trust the promises He gives in his Word. We must come to Him with our hurts in prayer, and we must praise Him in the midst of tears because He is worthy.

Then, when we are near, we can wait – expecting what we may have thought was impossible. In your affliction I want to encourage you to wait confidently for God to work in your life. I pray that He brings to you a joy that sits deep in your heart and a contentment that rests on the truth that God is good all the time.

A while back, my father gave me some advice that I have often returned to. He said, “If God has laid a calling on your heart, He will find a way to make it happen.” You do not have to worry that the calling will expire or disappear. It may not be according to the timeline you imagined or look the way you envisioned, but the seeds God plants in your heart will grow into what He intends if you can remain faithful and patient.

We all have stories of brokenness and hopefully redemption of loss coupled with learning to trust God’s goodness.

I married an amazing man who seemed to be made to be an awesome dad. He is cheerful, loving and has a child like spirit. He loves kids and uncle Dan is every kids favorite person to play with. When we married I had a 8 year old who loves Daniel and to Jack Daniel is his dad. But he had never had one of his own. after we where married. I got pregnant and Daniel was ecstatic. then we found out it was twins and it was even more excitement. Then came the news that they had no heartbeat. The dark emptiness of this loss set in.

Everything felt so hopeless.

So broken.

So impossibly sad.

The doctors appointments, the tests, the waiting, it was all we ever thought about. I knew God had called Daniel to be a dad. Why wasn’t it working? The I realized he already was.

Infertility and loss are socially taboo – they aren’t topics that most people are comfortable discussing in casual conversation. At some point, I realized if I didn’t step out I would have become isolated, not just socially, but I would also pulled away from God. Anger and hurt had sprung from situation. The emotions that accompanied the loss — grief, anger, doubt, jealousy, depression, and isolation. My sweet husband and family did their best to support me and pushed me to trust God’s plan.

The time that followed my miscarriage turned out to be one of the richest spiritual times in my life. I learned to lean in deeply to God and to trust Him to care for me. I began to pour my energy into focusing on my relationship with Him and my family. My faith grew. My marriage strengthened. My depression faded. I began to see His goodness all around me. It’s so ironic: my loss led to such a fertile spiritual time. While the personal and spiritual redemption I experienced was incredible on its own. I was given a passion for vacation Bible school. To write, direct and be a part of teaching all children of God and His love.

God had taken my brokenness and redeemed it. And it was perfect.

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” – Psalm 73:26

My hands were surrendered, and my heart was open.

It’s been 9 years since We had a miscarriage and God allowed me to trust in His way in my life. I’ve learned that God writes the best stories, but first we must hand Him the pen.

In 2 Corinthians 4, Paul is sharing his story with us in hopes of encouraging the weary hearted. He knows in this fallen world that we will experience:

  • External Chaos: We are afflicted in every way. The pressures of life are overwhelming.
  • Internal Confusion: We are perplexed. Sometimes circumstances just do not seem to make sense.
  • Undeserved Criticism: We are persecuted. We often face rejection, misunderstanding, and abuse.
  • Unexpected Catastrophe: We are struck down. This wicked world wounds us, and it’s hard to keep walking.

Paul wants us to know that brokenness is not the end of our story. My sister, God is not through with you yet. If you invite Him into your pain, He will step in and give you:

  • Help: Your Protector will never allow this world to crush you.
  • Hope: He will give you peace that surpasses understanding.
  • Healing: He will never leave you nor forsake you. He will restore you.
  • Heaven: This fallen world is just a temporary camp. He is preparing a permanent home for you with no more pain or sorrow.

God wants to strengthen you, shine His glory through you, and transform your mess into a ministry of encouragement to others.

With hands extended and hearts full, we will brightly display God’s redemption to the watching world.